Vampira, you’re out

Rifftrax live featuring the “worst movie ever made,” Ed Wood’s Plan9 From Outerspace and the premire of Project Runway. Is there anything better?

Shawn and I went to watch the Rifftrax live at Fenway 13. Rifftrax is composed of the guys who did Mystery Science Theatre 3000 and they had broadcast a live snarking of Plan 9 into movie theatres across the country. My favorite part, besides Vampira and her walking-around-a-fake-graveyard was the short they showed in the beginning. It was an old, I guess what would today be a National Geographic special or 60 minutes profile about a woman becoming a stewardess. It was made in the 1950s so it’s no surprise they referred to how the women must be slim and attractive and mentioned “wedding bells.” It was like watching a black and white version of  a modern issue of Cosmo magazine! All that was missing was a step-by-step description plus diagram of how to use a scrunchie during foreplay.

My favorite line from the entire evening came from this stewardess short. A man got off the plane and one of the guys said, “Hi, I’m Bob Executive. Which way’s business?”

vampira2 As for Vampira – wow. Where the hell have I been? As a former goth girl, I should have her life story tattooed on my ankle in Edwardian script. Or at least emulated her consciously.

This woman spent the entire movie walking through a terribly fake graveyard with a murderous look on her face and long red nails that put Morticia Addams to shame.  I wish they would have given her more to do. Rock on, Vampira. Rock on with your goth self!

As for Project Runway – so glad this show is back. Watching it always makes me want to buy bolts of fabric and design something fabulous for me to wear. But I can’t sew so I’m sure anything I made would look like a pillowcase with arm holes. I could totally make that work.


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