Not in a good place today, kids. There is a crack in the Arctic ice shelf that you could drive a fucking truck through, a greedy orange boil has appointed a climate change denier to head up the only agency in our government designed to protect the planet, and maybe Russia was responsible for some fuckery during our election.
Let’s ignore that ever-present feeling of helplessness and despair to talk about Gilmore Girls shall we?
Happy new year! Before I get into my review of this episode, I wanted to say a big THANK YOU to you, the reader. Yes, YOU. Thank you so much for sticking with me through this, though Gotham, and through whatever other nonsense I’ve posted in this tiny corner of the interwebs. Thank you if you clicked here by accident one time, or just started reading yesterday, or have been with me from day one. THANK YOU.
In 2015, my blog received just over 10,000 views. Ten thousand. For someone who didn’t even clear 300 views in 2014, this is a huge deal. I never thought I’d get over 10,000 views! To be honest, I never thought I’d get more than 10. I know my view number might not be a big deal in the grand scheme of the Internet as a whole, but it’s a big fucking deal to me. I could not be more grateful. I cannot thank you all enough. You are the best.
This cold open is all about shitty music, laundry, and coupons. It’s like being forced to have a conversation with your most boring aunt.
Palette cleanser – here’s a lion playing with a tire:
It’s the morning after the dance marathon and the girls are having problems walking, talking, and combining their psychic powers to move Luke’s closer to them. What they really need is the power of instant transmission.
Currently debating if the ability for both Rory and Lorelai to go Super Saiyan would be the greatest thing to happen to this show or the worst. (Full disclosure – I used to be so into Dragonball Z. We can’t even talk about it. Love the whole thing up to the end of the Cell Saga. Everything after (especially fucking Saiyaman) can eat all the dicks.)
We begin this episode with Lane excited about band practice and Lorelai having premonitions about her own death. She had a dream about being eaten by a turtle and her face swings to the back of her head. Since Lorelai is not actually going to die we can ignore most of this cold open.
Rory’s application to Harvard has arrived! And it’s dropped off by a mailman who not only opens the front door to deliver the mail, but he leaves the door wide open because all Stars Hollow characters lack boundaries.
The episode opens with Sookie, Lorelai, Rory, and Michele listening to a song by Ella Fitzgerald. Sookie wants to walk down the aisle to this suicide anthem but no one wants a Heaven’s Gate situation to break out at a wedding (see? I can drop dated references into my shit, too.)
Here’s another one